The Big Big Bang

(from left to right: Karen Gravano, Drita D'Avanzo, Carla Facciolo, Renee Graziano)

For some reason, every Sunday night around 12am as I am flipping through the channels, I have ended up on VH1's Mob Wives. This new show is like the Real Housewives of New York City, minus the "class" and with exponentially greater profanity. I'm still not quite sure how I feel about it, other than to wonder, are there no Carmela Sopranos anymore?

The four women showcased are Renee Graziano (daughter of mobster Anthony Graziano, ex-wife of "Junior" who is currently incarcerated), Drita D'Avanzo (wife of Lee DiAvanzo, currently incarcerated), Karen Gravano (daughter of Sammy the Bull, who turned informant and brought down John Gotti), and Carla Facciolo (wife of Joseph Ferragamo, currently incarcerated).

Now, I've always had a fascination with the mob predating "The Sopranos" on HBO.

But these women defy the traditional stereotype I had of Mob Wives from fictional television and movies. When I first heard that VH1 was making a show called "Mob Wives," I envisioned tough, but semi-classy women like Carmela Soprano or Karen Hill of "Goodfellas." These women, although accustomed to a pampered lifestyle, were tough and often took their husbands to task, even if only in the realm of the domicile.

However, the Mob Wives VH1 is portraying seem to be foul-mouthed, spoiled, and very self-centered. I consider Carmela Soprano to be spoiled, but she certainly is more refined than these women. Carmela cared about her family, while these women seem to treat their children or husbands as an afterthought.

The women on Mob Wives hurl expletives not only at one another but also use them excessively in their everyday conversations. They think they are better than everyone else and that they deserve respect, lest whoever offends them or gets in their way face the wrath of their husbands or exes.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I rarely remember Carmela pulling the Tony card so readily to get what she wanted. That is not to say she didn't use it, or use her influence over her to get something. But she seemed more real to me. I could sympathize with her sometimes. Karen Hill and this new generation of Mob Wives on VH1, not so much.

I feel no sympathy for them. They may have gained a level of class through wealth, but that does not make them good people or classy for that matter. I enjoy watching to see what happens, or what ridiculous drama they can create for themselves.

However, these women, despite having husbands in jail, do not seem to be portrayed as having "real people" problems. Yes, some of them find it difficult to deal with being single mothers, but they have the money and resources (maids, chauffeurs, etc.) to be able to balance that out.

In one episode, Renee reacts to a drunk guy in a bar coming up to her and Karen while making disparaging comments about sex. She freaks out and rather than let it go, calls her ex-husband "Junior" to come down to take care of the problem. That, to me, seems like she is wielding her "influence" in a situation that can easily be remedied through turning a blind eye. Yet, this was the whole last 20 minutes of a 60 minute episode with 15 or more minutes of commercials most likely.

Carmela would have told the guy to eff off and left. She might have told Tony about it afterwards, but she certainly wouldn't let it ruin her life like Renee pretended it to do.

It's a train wreck, I guess, and I can't stop watching. I don't know if it's because the women are all so vapid ("Oh my gosh. Thank you so much. You're like the hundredth person who's told me that.") or if it's because just the word "mob" for me conjures up all of these late night wheelings and dealings where it is agreed who needs to get taken out, who needs a talking to for not bringing in their cut, or what. But it seems to me the old mob wife has been replaced by the spolied, entitled, self-centeredness that has become rampant in America today. I will probably keep watching just to make myself feel better about my life and to make fun of these chicas loca. Until the next blog post...

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished (With apologies to "Wicked")

One question haunts and hurts too much, too much to mention:was I really seeking good or just seeking attention? Is that all good deeds are when looked at with an ice-cold eye? If that's all good deeds are, maybe that's the reason why no good deed goes unpunished.

Once again I re-learned for the umpteenth time that it is impossible to rely on anyone to help you. No matter how nice you are, no matter how much you do, it doesn't seem to matter. You help your family, friends, co-workers, but some days you just wonder why you even bother.

I thought I was having a good day today...visiting my grandmother, tutoring at school to earn some extra money before summer session starts next week. But when I visited my mother, that day seemed to go downhill.

I apparently didn't do enough to help her while I was there, and she took it out on me a bit. I pretty much helped her run the household when I lived there, and somehow it's my responsibility to help her run it when I no longer live there. I don't do a good enough job, surprise.

The electrician is coming tomorrow to install some lighting and do some rewiring. My mother had me put out the boxes of lights, cords, etc. that had been ordered for them to use. Thinking I was saving my brother time by taking them out (since he has to go over to let them in tomorrow), I texted and tweeted him to let him know what I had done.

I was looking for no prize, no overt "Oh, you're so wonderful. I don't know what I would do without you." And what did I get? Him accusing me, via text, of giving him attitude and "coming at him" angrily. I love it. Only he could interpret something that way (although he learned it from my father) and compound the ruin of a perfectly good day that began after I left work.

I don't understand why people always feel the need to be so cruel. I'm sorry that it's not enough that I work full-time, help my mother with her house, help my grandmother, pretty much singlehandedly help organize everyone's affairs.

Often I believe I was born in the wrong time period. Chivalry is dead. Women look at you like your nuts when you try to hold doors for them or do anything courteous in any way. Family members think you never do enough. Co-workers, although they may not say it, do not think you are adequate.

I try to be a good person and help but as I mentioned in the first paragraph, it is all for naught. There's no point in being nice to anyone or expecting anyone to be able to help you. In the end you are all alone. No one cares. They may say the right things, even sometimes marginally do the right things for show, but that's what it is. A show. An act. Smoke and mirrors.

I don't know if it's because I live in the US that I constantly feel out of place, or if it's because I truly was not meant to live successfully in this era because I am stuck in outmoded, obsolete ways that no longer matter in this world. I guess I'll never know. Which is why even though I smile and act the nice boy, I'm starting to mean it less and less because people care less and less.

The corrupt, the conniving, the evil always seem to get rewarded. Wall Street bankers. Hedge fund managers. No one has any sense of ethics or morality any more and sometimes I wonder, why should I? Then I realize that it's small time people like me who would probably get caught or get comeuppance in some form.

But no good deed goes unpunished, and I guess that is the lesson for today. Good night all.

The Killing of Molly Hartley

There was a remake of "Charade" a few years back. I wanted to see it but couldn't remember what it was called. I knew there was something about somebody named Charlie. So I called it "There's Something About Charlie." In reality it was "The Truth About Charlie" and starred Mark Wahlberg and sylph Thandie Newton. I still haven't seen it though.

Another example: my brother Dennis has a friend named JJ. I could never remember his name for the life of me so I just started referring to him as "RJ Berger." Instead of saying, "Did you go to JJ's?" I would say "How was RJ Berger?" My brother would get very annoyed when I referred to his pal JJ like this so I stopped.

Back on topic, the new AMC show that premiered last night, "The Killing," is something I had wanted to see since I started to hear about it a while back. I remember the ads asking, "Who killed Rosie Larsen?"

I could never remember the Rosie tagline, so I simply referered to the show as "The Killing of Molly Hartley." The mishmash I put together sounded syllabically similar to "The Haunting of Molly Hartley," a movie that came out in 2008 starring Haley Bennett, Chace Crawford, and the grrrrreat looking AnnaLynne McCord. Rosie Larsen sounded like Molly Hartley to me so that's what I call the show.

It was with great anticipation that I waited for and finally watched the first two episodes broadcast last night. For those detective fiction fans out there (myself included), this show is an excellent mystery that utilizes nearly all elements of the genre masterfully.

Based on the runaway Danish hit Forbrydelsen ("The Crime"), it's dark, sad, cynical, and wryly funny at times. It opens with Rosie Larsen's last moments, although in excellent Holmesian fashion, we are made aware something terrible is about to happen but we do not know at the hands of whom.

We follow Detective Sarah Linden (Mireille Enos, "Big Love") on her last day of work before moving to California with her son and fiance, as she is called in to investigate a report of a potential dead body based on circumstantial evidence. We also meet her cocky new partner, who appears to have secrets of his own.

Molly's (I mean Rosie's) parents are played well, particulary her mother Mitch Larsen (Michelle Forbes, the one who's not Tara from "True Blood," in the picture below, a.k.a. the white lady). Her mother is at the same time laid back and tragic as she grapples with the loss of her daughter. By the way, I'm not really spoiling anything since the name of this show is "The Killing" and AMC has been advertising so much.

A politician named Darren Richmond (Billy Campbell, who played The Rocketeer in the Disney film of the same name) who becomes involved in the investigation later on or a vengeful, stuck up ex-boyfriend, could have committed this crime. Everyone has a motive. Perhaps Linden's fiance who is awaiting her arrival in California had something to do with it?

If you have a chance to catch it on repeat or on demand I highly recommend it. Every time the show builds the motive and opportunity for each character, we are introduced to someone else who has just as much motive. As lovers of detective fiction know, the interconnectivity of the characters is nothing new.

Potential red herrings are flying, and only one will ultimately solve the mystery. But until then we (or at least I) will keep watching, trying to figure out who killed Rosie Larsen.

And swear to Taco is a pretty lame way to end a blog, so I'm considering other options. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

Mo' Money, Mo' Problems?

It is today I write this blog with a heavy heart as we, the College of the Holy Cross class of 2002, mourn the loss of one of our own. Douglas (Doug) Hommel passed away this past Friday, March 18. The funeral is today from what I heard.

We had many amazing times in class, at pub night on Tuesdays, and on the weekend. Doug, you will be missed. Doug was a fun, outgoing kid, and probably one of the few students from Chaminade that I actually liked and was friends with. He was a great person.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Chaminade, it is an all-boys preparatory high school in Mineola on Longuh Island.

The pronunciation of the word long as lon-'guh is not an exaggeration for those of us who arrived at Holy Cross (not from that area) and heard the pronunciation that forever changed how we saw the word. You weren't from Long Island; you were from Lon-guh Island.

Chaminade, like many other prestigious high schools in the Northeast and New England (I hate to offend those of you not from the Northern part of the East Coast as I am sure in the Midwest and California you have many esteemed institutions, but let's face it. We in the northeast rule. Well, except for maybe New Jersey. We take no responsibility for that. I kid because I love.

At Holy Cross we went to school with the children of diplomats, government officials, and barons of industry. Before I came to Holy Cross I had no idea the extent to which swaths of wealth blanketed the northeast and New England. I had gone to Aaaachmere for high school (pronounced thus by my former roommate David Robles; actual pronunciation Archmere) where I ran into my fair share of snobs and wealth, but nothing like Holy Cross.

When I was an RA I can't even tell you the number of times when patrolling the halls and breaking up parties, even in the actual disciplinary hearings themselves that followed, I heard the phrase "Do you have any idea who my father is?" Or, "I am gonna have my father come up here so quickly and he'll take care of everything."

Most of the people at Holy Cross were uber nice and amazing people. But sometimes the level of snobbery would stun me. Someone I know who went to Regis High school (another prestigious NY HS) came over to my dorm when we were having a party my sophomore year and looked annoyed that all we had was beer. He said "Oh, I see we're getting drunk the poor man's way tonight." At first I thought he was kidding, but he really meant it.

You would think that all the wealth I encountered on a daily basis would have inspired me to want that kind of life. You know, to be like the young people on a show like Gossip Girl where all you do is party and you use your connections, money and influence to get what you want.

It has inspired me, but I must say that even though I am a lowly teacher at a Community College, I would not change my station or status for anything. I enjoy being normal, knowing how to wait in line at different places. I enjoy interacting with the cogs in all of the bureaucracies I (like many of you) encounter every day.

Take the DMV for instance. No one likes to go to the DMV. But when you're there, everyone is equal and the same. Black, white, rich, poor need to do the same types of things. License renewal. Title services, etc.

"Do you have any idea who my father is?" isn't going to fly there. If you said that to one of the workers there you'd probably get the same response "Did you fill out the 10-16 form sir? No? Well, you have to go to that desk over there, fill out the 10-16, and wait in line again to bring it back to me." If I worked at the DMV and someone said angrily or out of frustration, "Do you know who my father is?" to me, I would ask "Is your voice dressing up for Halloween right now?"

Anyway, enough of that for today. I'm done. Swear to Taco.

Welcome to the World

My name is Jack and I am a husky taco. Not really; I actually called the blog husky taco because I think Husky dogs are cool and I enjoy ethnic foods. I looked for a picture of a husky with a taco in its mouth but couldn't find any.

I have a cat named Taco who looks like a husky. I myself am husky, though, if we're talking about the adjective. The cat pictured on the page is not Taco. That's Battlecat. Yes, like He-Man.

I recently bought a house in Deacon's Walk in Newark that I love. Taco's name was Deacon when I got him at the SPCA, but it didn't quite stick. So I named him Taco after the character on "The League."

Teacher by day, helper of family by night. When not at school I am helping out my mom with her house and I help my grandmother at Rockland Place, the assisted living facility where she lives.

I teach math at a local college in Wilmington and although I enjoy it very much I feel like the students are not as bright as they were a few years ago. Somebody asked me why a triangle doesn't have four sides. Swear. To. Taco.

PS: Until I find a better way to end the blog (Dy-no-MITE! or some other enchanting catch-phrase), we'll go with swear to taco.